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The opportunities are delicious for bloated internet companies: now a software company could know how warm your home is, what times of day are noisy, whether you have a pet, when you turn on your lights or if you listen to music while having sex.

Smart devices are sold as a way to improve your life — and in many ways, they do to an extent — but it also means those gadgets are incredible troves of data that could eventually turn into Software-as-a-Service money makers, just like Nespresso did to coffee.

The technology is better, the signup process is easier, and it’s still considered to be the best dating service on the planet.

If guys like us running an adult personals site suggest it, then you’re crazy not to try it out.

At first I was just making jokes about these things, but the situation is worse than I initially thought.

I’m talking about devices like this bullshit 0 Wi Fi connected juicer, a smart egg-minder, a cat-tracking water fountain or this bizarre Bluetooth umbrella.

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